As you know, my friends, I am in the midst of, in all modesty, THE GREATEST KICKSTARTER CAMPAIGN since Hercules asked for a little help to buy a squeegee for his Augean Stables project.

It is The Tesla Trilogy, and if you are a faithful follower of my blog, you know all about its groundbreaking tales of adventure featuring Nikola Tesla, the hottest innovator since Prometheus. (GET IT? I am a renowned person who makes references to Classical literature to look smerter.)


Little-known fact: “Dunce” is actually Latin for “smert.”

My first video for the campaign was, um, let’s just say a bit “slapdash.” I sat out on my porch and talked to my shaking iPhone. The reviews were harsh and the results very poor indeed. But that is all in the past—and, more importantly, deleted—and it has been replaced by a fun and informative video about the entire trilogy, set to my favorite music of all time of EVAR. Please check it out, won’t you? Be sure to have your sound on!

There’s just two weeks from today (it ends December 7) to get on board the Tesla Trilogy Kickstarter steam-powered locomotive!

Crazy trainLittle-known fact: “Locomotive” is Spanish for “crazy train.”

You will get all three novels, audiobooks, eBooks, and possibly even a Tesla fez and a faux-leatherbound, gold-stamped, signed and numbered hardback omnibus edition of all three books!

Hope to see you there, my friends.


We must make the World we want to live in!

When I took my nightly peyote tablet washed down with Absinthe last night and hooked my legs over the bar in the closet and hung upside-down to rest, two visions came to me:

In one, my Kickstarter for The Tesla Trilogy gets fully funded and the world has these wonderful books …

Happy Tesla Land

But in the other, it doesn’t get funded and … well, look for yourself! It’s too horrible for me to contemplate any further!

Sad No-Tesla Land

Avoid the horrors of terrible books and incandescent lighting! Please become a part of The Tesla Trilogy Kickstarter today!

Your friend in the fight,

Why risk not backing my Kickstarter? Read this and reap the benefits!

I don’t wish to alarm anyone. This letter, although gruesome in subject and harrowing in aspect, does not threaten a lack of well-being if it is not passed on or if you do not accede to its request for funding the most awesome tril[STOP THAT. Ahem. Excuse me. The hype machine has apparently lost the widget thing that keeps it from hyperbole. All apologies].

To continue, this letter does not ask you to fear the future. It simply asks you to look at the evidence of the PAST. Have any of these ever befallen you or one you love, care about deeply, or call in the wee hours as drunk as a pickled Irishman? Think carefully now, and remember … yes, remember … has the following ever happened to you or anyone you know?

  • In school, a bigger kid bullied you, physically or psychologically.
  • At work, a higher-ranking employee bullied you, whether in your cubicle or in his or her fancy goddamn office.

Continue reading

The Tesla Trilogy and You: Act Now! Ask Me How!

(This mega-entertaining, ultra-informative, and relentlessly useful blog entry is dedicated to one Bunny Reynolds, who got me off my butt at last.)

I hereby plead guilty, in the First Short Circuit Court of Bloggage, to the charge of Blog Abandonment On Account Of I Got Busy With Other Stuff.

The sentence is “Sheepishly and Apologetically Get Your Lazy Ass Posting Again.” Plus 1 hour and 30 minutes of watching Paul Blart 2, which manages to make my adoptive home town of Vegas look really stupid instead of just really tacky. (I got off easy — I could have been sentenced to watch Last Vegas, starring the dessicated corpses of Michael Douglas, Morgan Freeman, goddamn Robert DeNiro, and Kevin Kline. In their memory, I pour out a bottle of Easy Paycheck, their favorite vintage.)

Cast of Las Vegas

So lifelike!

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It’s time to be thinking 2016 Cons!

While I whittle down my wish list of Comic Cons and film festivals and such for 2016 that I will do in support of my books and, as ever, Lovecraft content portal, please have a gander at the magnificence that is my special “for Cons” résumé:

Sean Hoade CV for Cons 2015_Page_1Sean Hoade CV for Cons 2015_Page_2Sean Hoade CV for Cons 2015_Page_3Sean Hoade CV for Cons 2015_Page_4

I think this looks good. I think I’m going to go with this. :)


My evil lair office nook is coming along nicely!

In preparation for the arrival of roomie Calvin, I have moved my office into the kitchen nook and am doing it with FLAIR, dammit! (Click on pics for close-ups.)

My office shelf 10-13-2015

The shelf of horrors and also fine men’s grooming pint glasses.

Hat shelf 10-13-2015

I like hats. And booze.

Cthulhu on wall in office 10-13-2015

All five eyes look upon you with annoyance.

Walls need posters and whiteboards and such.

Walls need posters and whiteboards and such.

More to come!

Chuck Wendig on How to outline during National Plot Your Novel Month

Same old shit or crazy new shit?

Chuck Wendig is a novelist, screenwriter, and game designer. This is from his blog. He talks a lot about writing. And food. And pop culture. And his kid. He uses lots of naughty language. NSFW. Probably NSFL. Be advised.

Next month is National Novel Writing Month, aka NaNoWriMo.

This month, I am declaring to be NaPloYoNoMo, or National Plot Your Novel Month. Or, if you prefer the more profane edition, NaPloYoMoFuGoDaNoMo month.

I want you to think about the planning, plotting and scheming of your novel.

I want you to think about outlining that novel.

Now, some of you are resistant to the idea of outlining. I know. I get it. Some of you upon hearing the word “outline” clenched up so hard, your buttholes permanently sealed shut. Now it’s just a smooth patch of flesh like bubble gum stretched across a puckered mouth.


Calm down. Unseal thine buttocks.

Read the rest at terribleminds!